feb. 9, 2007

LIFE IS FULL OF CHOICES...

AND SO I CHOSE CAREFULLY.

ITS JUST THAT, HE CHOSE SOMEONE ELSE.

feb. 02, 2007

all i have are the thoughts of you (para kay manok)

i dont know who that is you want to find somewhere.

and i also dont know who that someone you said you only have are a name and a number.

but i just wanna let you know too,

that HE knows how much i miss and long for those times that we stare at each other and just stare at each other.

those times that we share the smoke i clip by my lips.

those times that we drink until i fall on my knees.

but now, i just satisfy those longings watching you from a distance and how i wish i can still have the chance to stare at you without reasons,

share with you the smoke i clip evrynight now in my darken lips,

and i wish i can still fall on my knees and you're there to shout at me "BURAT KA NA!".

thoughts of you cant help me bring back those times.

its you.

feb. 2, 2007

im every minute in defeat.

its easy to fight when you are winning.

its so easy to stand up and be brave when the victory is already approching.

but for me, who cant see any victory ahead,

who didnt have the chance to win from so many battles,

who never had anyone to be there atleast,

who just fell hard on the ground,

can somebody tell me,

how would you fight if you're like me?

i am already losing hope.

its so near.

i feel the lonely sentiments of a person who is fighting against the rest of the world.

but i still want to stand once more and take a good try.

so after this moments,

i just give my self a good cry.

jan. 24, 2007

to that person with a Black Anatomy.

you know why until now we dont have

this thing below----?

world peace.

well, it is because there are still alot of "ugly-minders inside their dumb-black anatomy" walking around the planet.

i asked them: Do i look like a bitch or a whore if i wear this thing?

they answered or, better yet, she answered: NO! you can carry it very well, infact!

so if thats her opinion then why the hell she keeps on bothering me about my outfits that i know its not that conservative either it is that seductive.

im just being me.

or maybe because of her insecurities that she cant wear such!?!?

well, its not my fault.and i should not be blamed by her indifferences and complexities!

i really hate her!

i really hate the kind of people who just keeps on growing old and making her body that big, but is thinking backwards and very much conceited!

its not for her to understand the world and ME!

so long, i am not hurting anybody or causing harm to anyone,

why should i bother?

its just a matter of minding your own business!

i will really remember you with blazing fire, not just on your nose, but all over you!!!

ASSHOLE!

jan.23, 2007

para kay manok.

hoi manok !! gari kna manok!!

datapwat...

ikaw ay hari ng pintakasi.

ayos lng.

hmmp.

MANOK!!!

dai taka naiintindihan pero sinasabi ko parin na naiintindihan kita.

at sasabihin ko NAIINTINDIHAN tlga kita!

kahit hindi.

tuktaraok!=)

pag ganyan ka pa rin...

ganito ang kalalabasan mo..

haha.

charing!=)

january 22, 2007

I've lost my place on this earth

To Watch You Leaving . . .

is to know such pain, it's jagged edges tearing into my soul. As a stake from the garden tears into the warm, dark earth.

To Watch You Leaving . . .

knowing all the while that never again will I fit myself, warm with sleep, against your solid back.

Nor hear your steady breathing. Or feel the beating of your heart.

To Watch You Leaving . . .

aware in every moment of every day that my dreams, my future; once tied with silken ribbons to yours, will never come to be.

And the mornings once so silent and hopeful, us gazing at the mountains and so gently awaiting forever - are now but small pieces of my past.

To Watch You Leaving . . .

your heart a tight fist of anger and your dry eyes betraying nothing of you. I cry for both of us, my love, because you will not.

To Watch You Leaving . . .

is to know that I've lost my place on this earth. My station. My heart's home. That I will wander, forever a nomad. Alone and afraid. And in my troubled dreams watch you leave, again and again.

For the balance of my days.

jan. 18, 2007

MY NEW YEAR. oh. i forgot to post this. its very late!

i know its very much late to still post this thing.

but, juz wanna share, how my new year had been, to you and especially to that individual who i just saw awhile ago here in this cafe, who made my new year this way.....

In the din of fireworks and noisy drums, of colored lights in the doorways, and the clamor of the crowd yearning for peace and prosperity, I wandered like a sleepwalker until dawn, watching the fiesta thru my tears, dazed by the hallucination that it was I, and not a new year, who had been born that night-------born to fall into a deeper loneliness and much more a deeper cut of the worst pain.

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